Tag Archives: relationships

BDSM Basics: How to Find a Kinky Partner in 10 Steps

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tumblr_mr5wbcFjyQ1swo0q8o1_400You’re probably expecting a super short list of easy-to-do tasks like “Sign up for FetLife” or “Wear more leather!”, but sorry to break it to you, finding a kinky partner is probably just as hard, if not harder, than finding a vanilla one.

For one, finding a kinky partner means finding someone that shares your common interests, that you enjoy spending time with, and also doesn’t mind calling you a slut from time to time. Whereas, finding a vanilla partner can be as simple as walking into the nearest club or bar and turning on the charm (ok, so maybe that’s a little over-simplified).

But finding that perfect blend of kinky and acceptable mate material can be a difficult job so we’re going to give you some pointers on how to find that special someone who is willing to slap your ass AND cuddle with you on the couch!

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The Price of Pleasure: A Sex Toy Poll

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While doing research for ASI’s upcoming projects and affiliations I was disappointed to find that there is little information available on the PRICE we pay for our sexual pleasure.

Personally, I’ve never spent over $100 for a toy.. and the toy that came the closest to that number is probably my favorite. Daddy has purchased cheap toys from “specialty stores”, but they turned out to pretty much be junk, burning out in a few days or just being unable to hit the sweet spot.

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Anal Advice: Prostate Play

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ASI received a fan question from a male who seemed ashamed to ask his female partner to repeat a few anal tricks on him and he wasn’t sure how to approach it with her in the future. I can definitely understand where he was coming from, but I also felt kind of bad. It is extremely unfortunate that in our society prostate and male anal play is seen with such a negative stereotype and it’s seen that way because of the stigma that surrounds being a homosexual male. As someone who fully supports trans* and gay rights, it makes me extremely sad to see this unfair stigma effecting what should be a very healthy sexual activity between consenting adults. Continue reading →

BDSM Basics: Caring For Your Toys

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After diving head first (as most of us do) into the world of BDSM we generally start to feel comfortable enough to purchase a few “toys”, then a few more, and a few more, and just a couple more.. until we have a collection that needs its own hiding space in the back of the closet. Sure, these toys are plenty of fun, but do you know how to properly take care of them? Continue reading →

The Good Girl’s Guide to Domination

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This is a PREVIEW article written by Akasha. To read the other chapters, visit her website. COPYRIGHT 2003, 2005 [email protected]

Photo from http://www.mrwallpaper.com

“I believe that many women are intimidated by and uncomfortable with the concept of erotic female domination because of the way they see it portrayed in adult films and in the media. I believe that men also develop many bad habits after years of satisfying their fantasies on their own, and focusing on their own pleasure. Through communication, trust and safe, sane & consensual exploration of erotic power exchange, I think many couples can experience pleasure they never imagined, and also develop better relationship communication and intimacy.” Continue reading →

Honesty: A Dominant’s Side, a Submissive’s Point of View

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tumblr_mr6ajoTFOa1swo0q8o1_500To be a Dominant, a true Dominant, is a hard job. Aside from the usual load of daily ‘Domhood’, a Dominant has to read His submissive. This is a very hard thing to do because how is one Man, whom from our submissive eyes is supposed to be this all knowing and in control person up on His pedestal, unable to just read us like a book? He has before, with a touch, a command. He’s shown that He knows you in how He treats you. So we assume its easy for Him to do so, to see through us because from the moment we became His, we think or believe somewhere deep within our minds that somehow He gained these magical ‘Dominant Powers’ that make Him everything He is when He is with us. He doesn’t and there isn’t. He is just a Man. A strong Man who can melt us with one glance and somehow bring out the best, or at least the desire to be our best, just for Him. Continue reading →

How BDSM Saved My Marriage and Gave Me Peace of Mind

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This is my personal story about how discovering and learning about BDSM helped my husband and me come to an important understanding within our marriage, as well as guided me to a place in my life where I am now comfortable with my body and who I am as a person. This is the journey from a vanilla marriage that was quickly falling apart to a 24/7 D/s lifestyle that has helped us become closer than ever. Continue reading →

Pleasure, Pain and Science…Part Two

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Before you read this, please take a look at Part One! right here- http://asubmissivesinitiative.wordpress.com/2013/07/21/pleasure-pain-and-science-part-one/, which discusses Pain. There will be a poll for Part Three, for you to participate in, so we can analyze a little information for ourselves, and maybe gain some insight. Either way, I hope you will enjoy it, and benefit from the information I’ve gathered.

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How to Spot a Potential Abuser

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Those red flags are there to expose an abuser if only we were trained to see them. You will read the list and think “Now why oh why didn’t I think of that!” This checklist is a general one, as well all know in the BDSM lifestyle, some of these signs are not that of an abuser but of a good dominant, but like all things it doesn’t hurt to have a good idea about what might fall under the category of a potential abusive relationship/person.

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